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Nobody likes to be misjudged and misunderstood. It happens when your actions or words, even your facial expression and looks, are misinterpreted by another person. When this happens, a lot of hurt is expected to be felt.
‘What happened?’
Usually, that’s the question that those who are misjudged and misunderstood have in their minds. They are often left to pick up the pieces, trying to figure out what went wrong. “Did I say something wrong? Did I communicate something in an erroneous way? What did I do wrong?” When these questions frequent your mind, then you need to do something about it.
Here are some things that you can do to clear up the wrong and usually harmful effects of being misjudged by others.
1. Look into what went wrong
The Lord Jesus said “the truth shall set your free” (see John 8:32), and this principle can’t be more true for this issue. You need to know what went wrong so that you can begin to fix what’s damaged.
Ask those who misjudged you about what went wrong. Probe into the issue and ask them why they reacted in the way that hurt you or offended them, if ever. Do your best to understand what happened.
2. Admit your faults to God
After probing, if you find that you are the one who is at fault, don’t hesitate to admit it. Don’t make excuses or point your fingers at the person who misjudged you, because if it’s your fault, it’s your fault. You alone have to confess your sin so that God can forgive you and take away your unrighteousness.
1 John 1:8-10 reminds us, “If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.”
3. Make efforts to reconcile with the people who misjudged you
If you are indeed misjudged or misunderstood, you need to tell your friends how they misjudged or misunderstood you, and also tell them how you are hurt. Follow Matthew 18:15-17’s instruction:
“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.”
In closing
Friend, do your best to make peace with those who misjudge or misunderstand you, seeking to clarify all issues. You should forgive those who hurt you and strive to live in peace with them. Doing so glorifies God and enables you to soar freely.
