Evangelism and Missions

What destroys marriages fastest?


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Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Marriage is hard work and it takes nothing less than this for a man and woman to grow together in love and service, but hard work on it’s own is not enough. A marriage where the grace of God that comes through Christ is absent is going to be built on the weakest foundation.

What is it that destroys marriages fastest? There are many ways a marriage can break, but the core of all marriage breakers is an absence of the love and grace of God. When a spouse is unfaithful, it stems out of a dissatisfaction that could have been met by the satisfaction of Christ. When a family is destroyed by finances, it’s because couples choose money over the Lordship of Jesus and the grace of God to provide.

Colossians 3:18-19 says, “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”

Marriage is hard because there is such a big design attached to it, far bigger than what we can manage by ourselves. Loving and submitting are not easy tasks and they are not tasks that we can fulfil on our own.

So many couples try to maintain a happy, no frills design and then turn up burnt out and exhausted by it. But we don’t have to work on our marriages alone. We can rely on God’s strength.

Just like any building needs a strong foundation, a marriage also needs to be built on a strong foundation. Our feelings, our abilities, our looks, our money are not good foundations. Only Jesus can be the sufficient foundation to set us firmly so we can build strong marriages that will withstand the tests of time and trial.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

When we acknowledge and live in a tripartite marriage where God is the head, we will love and serve our spouse not because we are able to but because we have confidence knowing that God is more than able to build our marriages for us.

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